Life Guard



2

I wouldn’t let you guard a shoe.

South Carolina

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Life Guard, 5.0 out of 10 based on 71 ratings

128 Comments, Comment or Ping

  1. wallyworld!

    I dub thee… METHASAURUS!

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    August 28th, 2009

  2. brian

    I wonder if she can get a refund on those breast implants?

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    September 5th, 2009

  3. Krista

    She’s the lifeguard for the WalMart gene pool.

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    September 5th, 2009

  4. jon

    Body by METH!

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    September 5th, 2009

  5. asd

    I would hit her

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    September 5th, 2009

  6. looks likes shes on the Jenny Crack diet.
    Crack Pipe for Breakfast
    Crack pipe for Lunch and
    a sensible dinner, if you can stomach it.

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    September 5th, 2009

  7. shadopilot

    EEWWWW!!

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    September 5th, 2009

  8. Wal-Martian

    if she’s the life guard of the wal-mart gene pool, someone drowned in the pool.

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    September 5th, 2009

  9. NEWT

    SHE IS LOOKING AT THE EMPTY SHELF, SHE MAY BE THINKING “WHAT THE HELL, ALL THE PRECURSORS ARE SOLD OUT …!!”

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    September 5th, 2009

  10. JD

    I think I’d rather drown.

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    September 5th, 2009

  11. ProfeSSor Vile

    I’d tap that, AIDS be damned!

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    September 5th, 2009

  12. Carl Childers I Reckon

    I’d do her.

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    September 5th, 2009

  13. Joe

    please god, if i’m ever in that situation where she’s the lifeguard, let me die

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    September 6th, 2009

  14. DONHOLIO

    I can’t say that I know anyone who would want to CRACK that WHORE!

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    September 6th, 2009

  15. Tommyknocker

    Looks like she’s heading for the snack foods again…an empty rack for an empty rack…

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    September 6th, 2009

  16. jimi

    i’ve seen bigger knots on a 2X4 (is she on the stem fast diet?)

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    September 6th, 2009

  17. me

    mm

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    September 6th, 2009

  18. kbb

    Does anyone else see jamie lee curtis on crack?

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    September 6th, 2009

  19. Jessica

    Would someone please get this girl a sandwich?

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    September 6th, 2009

  20. YEA!!!

    Hell Yea, She can gard mine!!!

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    September 6th, 2009

  21. I love this site/app, but I don’t get it. You all just make fun of overweight people saying how “disgusting” they are. If their thin like this lady then she’s gotta be a crack addict??

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    September 7th, 2009

  22. taco tuesday

    She’s in charge of guarding the pseudoephidrine only, oh and lookin classy.

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    September 7th, 2009

  23. mikeyintheoc

    That was indeed a funny comment. ” I wouldn’t let ya guard a shoe”

    thanks

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    September 7th, 2009

  24. Lucid

    I think she is following the guy with the mullet in front of her

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    September 7th, 2009

  25. Dan Blocker

    There’s never a growth spurt around when you need one….Implants on aisle 12…

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    September 7th, 2009

  26. Nel

    Yikes… she looks sick… And yeah, she looks “on crack”-thin.

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    September 7th, 2009

  27. DBorg

    I think I’d rather drown then put my kids’ lives in her hands.

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    September 7th, 2009

  28. mexicanstallion

    Amber Quiring is that you??? Dang girl you lost a shit load of weight! LMFAO!

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    September 8th, 2009

  29. ICPagansEverywhere

    Don’t you need one before you can guard it?

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    September 9th, 2009

  30. Woostool

    I think I’ve seen her on Cops. Oh well, I’d pee in her butt!

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    September 9th, 2009

  31. VagaBondVinny

    Ahhhhh mesquitetoe Bites !!! I’d still hit it

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    September 9th, 2009

  32. JR

    That girl has a gallopin’ case of the uglies.

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    September 9th, 2009

  33. Admiral Fuzzybum

    Oh she’s not that bad.. small boobs kina sad.

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    September 9th, 2009

  34. justme

    ……How do we know if this is a girl?

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    September 9th, 2009

  35. Fuchface

    Where is the other Olsen twin?

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    September 10th, 2009

  36. Shawn foley

    that is really sad

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    September 10th, 2009

  37. kmb

    OMG!!! i think this is my stepsister…really, i’m not joking.

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    September 10th, 2009

  38. dubby

    WHATS CRACKINBACK IN HER NECK OF THE PIPE

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    September 10th, 2009

  39. Chuckie

    Is she strong enough to Dutch Rudder me? No… probably not. Guess I have to settle for giving her a Steamin Carl..

    She shaves all over….

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    September 10th, 2009

  40. Mike H

    Life guard? “Here, I’ll throw you a stick to help you float… er, waitaminute…”

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    September 11th, 2009

  41. rck

    One day she swallowed a cocktail olive and 10 guys left town. Now would someone please get her a sandwich?

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    September 11th, 2009

  42. Casey

    Yea, WalMart helps me save money after some Blue Kid got me fired!

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    September 11th, 2009

  43. Brian

    She and the guy she’s with both look like trash. I bet she’s given crabs to lots of guys.

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    September 11th, 2009

  44. windygirl

    WTF with her belly button(s)?

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    September 12th, 2009

  45. Ithoughtsotoo

    @JustMe

    I was thinking the same thing! Is this really a human of the female persuasion!?

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    September 12th, 2009

  46. emily

    you’re all stupid and ignorant. this girl doesn’t look ‘crack-thin’. I have drug addicts that come to my job and their crack-thin. Plus it looks like she’s either going or coming back from the beach as the guy behind her is in swim trunks.

    She’s thin, but not unhealthy thin. You’re all just jealous of her level of fitness.

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    September 12th, 2009

  47. MC

    Emily – how can a person be fit without any muscles? stick insect does not = fitness

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    September 13th, 2009

  48. That ain’t fit, or sexy. She’s got picked-at marks on her cheek. she has no muscle tone at all. Not a curve to her. Eat a cookie!

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    September 13th, 2009

  49. catzz

    Life Guard? Not MY life, sister!

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    September 13th, 2009

  50. mellimel

    dude i know her thats tootsie

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    September 14th, 2009

  51. Lindsey

    And why do you people keep saying you’d fuck her…?

    ewww

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    September 15th, 2009

  52. Anathema

    “I love this site/app, but I don’t get it. You all just make fun of overweight people saying how “disgusting” they are. If their thin like this lady then she’s gotta be a crack addict??”

    She’s scary, unhealthy thin.

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    September 15th, 2009

  53. Jody

    I think she used to be on Bay Watch until Pamela Anderson stole her boobs.

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    September 15th, 2009

  54. Christopher

    Notice her “bro” boyfriend behind her: He probably dates her because her physique reminds him of a 12-year old boy.

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    September 16th, 2009

  55. Nat

    she’s nice! :)

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    September 16th, 2009

  56. Kennebec

    Good Lawd! You’d need a lifeguard if you dive in that navel!!!

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    September 16th, 2009

  57. yep, you people are haters. all of you. what if she IS a lifeguard? what if she happens to save YOU or someone you give a crap about from drowning? either way… who cares? and to the people poking at her physique or small breasts… you’re effin’ lame jerkoffs.

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    September 18th, 2009

  58. Gene

    I’m tired of you fat fucks that think you are hawt. I could only hope this lifeguard could not save your fat fuck body but we all know you’d float.

    The girl is thin and very fuckable.

    As far as her belly button, it looks like she has a belly ring which is awesome.

    I wouldn’t be surprised if this was uploaded by someone that knows this girl and has a bunch of friends ragging on her.

    Grow the fuck up. This girl looks awesome.

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    September 18th, 2009

  59. thank you for share

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    September 18th, 2009

  60. MARKIE

    JACE and GENE…..

    Are you the Lifeguard and her Bo, respectively?

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    September 19th, 2009

  61. rob

    She actually has a pretty nice body, im not sold on the face. id estimate her weight at 110 lbs which is actually the weight of most actresses that you same jerkoffs love on tv. Her legs are a little thin and could use some gym time but her arms are typical for a girl that size. The clothes really dont help her case though and she should have never been out in public like that. Any girl that is willing to have her picture taken looking like that is probably not the classiest thing on the planet.

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    September 19th, 2009

  62. Michael Peski

    Nasty.

    And I have taken some for the team…

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    September 20th, 2009

  63. Overnight Stocker

    I would hit it
    Caveman Style

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    September 21st, 2009

  64. not so T-Dogg

    98 lbs max. Roll that bowl, girl, Roll that bowl.

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    September 24th, 2009

  65. not so T-Dogg

    Oh, not to mention they are looking at an empty shelf.. “oooo… just what i was craving! Look… we look normal… no one can tell we are skitzing at Walmart at 3am!”

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    September 24th, 2009

  66. ur mom

    whats awesome is that 65 percent of the people commenting on her being too skinny are morbidly obese… im not sure why this pic was ever even posted i know i could go to walmart and in five minutes find 30 people who are more whack lookin than her

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    September 24th, 2009

  67. Lo

    the only thing this girl has been guarding is the drugs at the meth lab

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    September 25th, 2009

  68. Lo

    if by life guard, you mean guarding all the drugs with her life… then yes… life guard

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    September 25th, 2009

  69. Lo

    oops i wrote that twice cause i didn’t think it went through

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    September 25th, 2009

  70. Anon

    Wait…That’s a girl?!! I thought it was Jake Busey. Eww….

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    September 26th, 2009

  71. cc

    Get some breast implants, this is painful to look at. Everything’s severe, hair pulled back taut, super-thin, a top that shows how thin she is. It looks like she has on a little kid’s t-shirt.

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    September 26th, 2009

  72. Soldier

    get that chick a double cheeseburger

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    September 27th, 2009

  73. Billy Jim Bob

    Marsha Marsha Marsha!!!

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    September 27th, 2009

  74. Psyclapse

    I would hit it… With a tire iron.

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    September 28th, 2009

  75. Jako

    Mouth to mouth? I’ll pass.

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    September 29th, 2009

  76. T-NYCE

    LMFAO!

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    September 29th, 2009

  77. Kate

    wooow… tuck that tampon string in!

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    September 30th, 2009

  78. Jay B

    Flat like a surf board!!!

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    October 1st, 2009

  79. Buster

    Ladies and gentleman, the delightful miss Nicole Kidman !!

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    October 2nd, 2009

  80. brian

    Paris Hilton??? At Wal Mart???

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    October 2nd, 2009

  81. brian

    Paris Hilton??? At Walmart????

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    October 2nd, 2009

  82. J

    She is actually pretty hot.

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    October 6th, 2009

  83. Denise

    Do you know what I think is funny? On all of these pictures there are comments from people saying these things are not funny or saying that we all need to get a life, yet they too are on the website looking at the pictures. Hypocrisy is a bitch.

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    October 6th, 2009

  84. Penny Wears Mowery

    “In other news, anorexic shoppers at a local Walmart approach a new aisle designed to, er, fill, er, their special needs”…film at eleven.

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    October 9th, 2009

  85. SMALL TITS RULE!

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    October 11th, 2009

  86. Holly

    I’m about 98% sure that this is the Wal-Mart close to my house because I’ve seen this girl before, and she wasn’t wearing much when I saw her either. If I’m right, and I remember correctly, she’s got Dolphins tattooed around her belly button.

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    October 12th, 2009

  87. Joanne

    Why would someone with no boobs go for the attempted “side boob” look? Side boob is only sexy….when you actually have boobs.

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    October 15th, 2009

  88. Sam

    hahah I know exactly where this is :) .
    myrtle beachhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

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    October 15th, 2009

  89. Joey

    last time I checked lifeguard was also one word lol

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    October 16th, 2009

  90. poon

    i thought it was a dude at first…..then i saw the neckalace……so i still cant tell :)

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    October 17th, 2009

  91. Lady_Aaliyah

    lmao “I wouldn’t let you guard a shoe” lol where do you guys come up with this stuff?

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    October 19th, 2009

  92. Rexallsage

    This photo was NOT photoshopped.

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    October 22nd, 2009

  93. jen

    if she came to “rescue” me, we’d both be drowning cuz my big ass weighs 3x much as her tiny little meth ass, i don’t care how buoyant the water is…

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    October 22nd, 2009

  94. heather

    at least she looks good in thoose clothes

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    October 23rd, 2009

  95. Amber

    I know plenty of women who are naturally this thin! What makes you assume she’s on drugs?

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    October 24th, 2009

  96. Joy

    That’s the WHITEST “lifeguard” I have ever seen!!

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    October 26th, 2009

  97. Jo

    Sure wouldn’t let her guard my dope…

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    October 26th, 2009

  98. Kelly

    Theres nothin wrong with this pic. She just needed somethin from the store. Damn people. I would so wear that. Expecially in the summer.

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    October 29th, 2009

  99. Joshua Stetar

    ewwww :)

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    November 3rd, 2009

  100. Barry Myhoginya

    Yea.. i’d do her.

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    November 3rd, 2009

  101. rudeomatic

    SKELETOR!

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    November 3rd, 2009

  102. Amber

    Okay, this could have been much worse! It could have been a picture of a 500 pound woman, wearing the same outfit.

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    November 5th, 2009

  103. Brian

    you people all just copy eachothers comments, the first 20 comments atleast are just meth and crack jokes, but i doubt even 18 of them thought it up on their own without reading the comments. and as for being ugly or skinny, honestly i know some girls way worse. although she needs to gain some weight, and guys need to stop saying “i’d hit that” no one cares about what you’d do to her, she probably wouldn’t feel the same. guys on this site are so fucked up! well, a lot of them seem to be atleast.

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    November 7th, 2009

  104. Red

    the caption just made my life!! lmao

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    November 9th, 2009

  105. Sherri

    Well..that’s what it seemed at first…moving a little closer it was discovered she is really a “GIRAFFE GUARD”…Silly me, for assuming!

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    November 10th, 2009

  106. Well…that’s what it seemed at first…but as it turns out she is actually a GIRAFFE GUARD!! Silly me for assuming!!

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    November 10th, 2009

  107. Sherri

    It turns out that this woman is really a GIRAFFE GUARD…Silly me for assuming!!!

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    November 10th, 2009

  108. Sherri

    Well, it turns out that she is actually a GIRAFFE GUARD…oops, pardon my assumption!

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    November 10th, 2009

  109. Sherri

    Well…it turns out that this lady is actually a GIRAFFE GUARD…shame on me for assuming!!

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    November 10th, 2009

  110. HAHAHAHAHA

    WOW!!! Look how empty the shelves are!! That’s how my WalMart is too!

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    November 11th, 2009

  111. Bayer

    IDK…she is definitely overly thin. But she’s obviously OHW to or from work, it’s not like she decided to go in JUST the bathing suit like so many people seems to. At least there’s no gut hanging out so far that you can’t see the life guard logo.
    All in all I don’t think this one was even really picture worthy. Not compared to the rest of the site at least :)

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    November 15th, 2009

  112. Nancy

    Why is Tonya Harding starving herself like that?

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    November 18th, 2009

  113. Don't Ask

    I work at this store and I know her. She does do meth. She lives two houses down from me. HAHA she is so pissed at this picture. She said she will never go to that Wal-Mart again LMAO

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    November 20th, 2009

  114. GREG HIGGINS

    WHAT DO YOU CALL AN ‘ANOREXIC’ W/A YEAST INFECTION?………..A QUARTER POUNDER W/CHEESE……

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    November 23rd, 2009

  115. Dani

    I’m a lifeguard, and she’s actually wearing the outfit:

    Lifeguard shirt
    Swimsuit
    Short shorts
    Flippy floppies
    Hair tied up

    So she may actually be a lifeguard

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    November 24th, 2009

  116. dick buttkiss

    Lifeguard? Where? At a cesspool?

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    December 2nd, 2009

  117. cant wait for that life guard jump in and safe me and get that tshirt wet

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    November 14th, 2010

  118. MR. GOGGLES

    :(

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    November 25th, 2010

  119. A

    She looks like a girl i use to go to highschool with..only the girl I knew had more of an athleteic build. I really hope this isnt her.

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    February 19th, 2011

  120. courtney

    you guys are only making fun of her because you are insecure with yourself and i dont even see what is wrong she is probably just on her lunch break getting a snack so get over it and find something else to do than be on this stupid innappropriate website making fun of people who cant take care of themselves.

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    March 29th, 2011

  121. billlybobobjr

    UGLY SHE ANT GOT NO ALIBY LOL :) :):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)

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    April 11th, 2011

  122. Alf

    LIFEGUARD………………………NOT IN THIS LIFETIME ! ! !

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    April 27th, 2011

  123. Alf

    @ Free Profile:

    WHY ? ? ?

    There’s NOTHING to see !

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    April 27th, 2011

  124. Alf

    Don’t Ask – November 20th, 2009

    I work at this store and I know her. She does do meth. She lives two houses down from me. HAHA she is so pissed at this picture. She said she will never go to that Wal-Mart again LMAO

    :-)

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    April 27th, 2011

  125. u8u8u8u8u8u

    omg wow

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    February 5th, 2012

  126. gigidy

    wow. when was she a life guard 15 years ago.

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    February 20th, 2012

  127. eldon

    life guard? I’d let her guard my cock with her mouth.

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    June 17th, 2012

  128. Thumper

    Ive done worse

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    January 17th, 2013

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