Poem Contest!



2748

This isn’t your normal caption contest, because this isn’t my normal request. I want to see how creative you guys are so please write your best “Ode to John Deere” poem that this woman likely has on her back. I was going to give you my poetic rendition but I don’t know the difference between a haiku and and cat poo.

Unknown

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Poem Contest!, 4.9 out of 10 based on 8 ratings

113 Comments, Comment or Ping

  1. Sir Hates Alot

    She’s not the first (if ou can believe it) and certainly won’t be the last.

    http://www.peopleofwalmart.com/?p=19682

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    May 19th, 2011

  2. Beth

    Oh my dear Deere, I love thee so,
    Without you, I’d have no where to go.
    You take me to Wally World at first crank,
    I wired up the radio so we can listen to Hank.
    I like your vibrations I get from your seat,
    I just don’t get why I never hear from the boys I meet……

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    May 19th, 2011

  3. MistressT

    Is her patch of grass that thick she needs a Deere to trim it?? Damn…

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    May 19th, 2011

  4. Jessica

    When we first met, my dearest Cletus,
    I was already heavy with my cousin’s fetus.
    You lifted me up when I was low
    and treated me like I wasn’t a ho.
    The power of love for you in my heart
    rumbles as loudly as when your John Deere does start.

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    May 19th, 2011

  5. Pam Hunter

    U think my tractor looks mean….well, I do bleed John Deere Green…….U think my tractor’s sexy and ya wanna ride………Well, u can ride here with me and show yer John Deere Pride….ya bring my lunch to the field…along with sweet tea….and u ride on the seat of my tractor with me…

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    May 19th, 2011

  6. bleu

    My son works at John Deere, and I like to think I can write a little,(“Pecadillos and stilettoes”) but I can’t top Beth.
    Bravo.

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    May 19th, 2011

  7. Kricket

    Is it bad that I actually know what that says? It is one of my favorite Dr. Seuss quotes.

    We are all a little weird and life’s a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love

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    May 19th, 2011

  8. Pass the eye bleach please

    Wow..another john deere tattoo…white trash at its finest

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    May 19th, 2011

  9. Drewford

    Roses are red
    Violets are blue
    Noone wants to see
    Your ugly tattoo

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    May 19th, 2011

  10. troy

    With the John Deere logo staring you in the face it’s got to be hard to think of anything other than “BackHo.”

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    May 19th, 2011

  11. Kelli Umstead

    At first I thought it was jagermeister and thought that was stupid. But John Deer that’s even more idiotic. Unless however she is the heiress to the john deer fortune.

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    May 19th, 2011

  12. rachael:)

    it says:
    “We are all a little weird and life’s a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.”

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    May 19th, 2011

  13. Teresa

    Dear John dear john
    how I love to sit on
    your seat of yellow and green

    Dear john dear john
    no job seems too big
    no yard seems too small
    you can handle it all

    Dear John dear john
    your vibrations I love
    when I sit on your seat
    of yellow and green

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    May 19th, 2011

  14. Janice

    I guess if you get stuck behind her in line at Walmart at least you have something to read besides the rag mags!

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    May 19th, 2011

  15. labillius jaffar

    john deere, john deere, so glad to see ya,
    form your seat i got gonorrhea,
    my boyfriends dad had told me so,
    now my boyfiends up and go,
    just how far is a big factor,
    because he done burned the tractor…

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    May 19th, 2011

  16. David O

    Is that a Deere on your Vagina?
    Or are you just happy to see me?

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    May 19th, 2011

  17. o.O

    John Deere is to lawns
    What Dear John is to break-ups
    They both seek greener grass

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    May 19th, 2011

  18. Troy20

    Drive my Deere,
    out of the sticks,
    Goin’ to Wally World,
    Douche on sale,
    two pack for $1.86!

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    May 19th, 2011

  19. Princess J

    I shudder to think where her International Harverster tatt is located.

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    May 19th, 2011

  20. soonuh

    Deere John, Please mow my lawn
    Please pull my plow from dusk till dawn.
    I’ll change your oil, I’ll do ya right
    if you’ll pull me home a date tonight
    I know gas is high, but your worth my bills
    Cuz I love you more than my crazy pills

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    May 19th, 2011

  21. O John Dear
    I love you so
    With your riding mower
    My lawn I do mow

    You take me places
    When my car don’t wanna
    You cause that cut grass smells
    almost as good as marijuana

    Your yeller and green colors
    are so beautiful to me
    Another brand of tractor
    An owner I will never be

    You also make
    My awesome hay baler
    I use it to to harvest
    The weed behind my trailer

    O Sweet John Deer
    Your so close to my heart
    I love you almost
    As my local Wal-Mart

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    May 19th, 2011

  22. lara

    Tractor, tractor
    Neverthless the factor
    of John Deere makes me a shiver
    My heart to quiver
    Redneck is no longer a color
    But the sign in which i “foller”
    So call me hillbilly and strum a banjo
    Squeal like a pig, make a wrong turn for you…
    I’m Wal-Mart bound in my canoe….

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    May 19th, 2011

  23. John, Dear

    I think it says:

    We’re all a little weird.
    Life is weird. When you
    find someone whose weirdness
    is compatible with yours
    you join in combined weirdness
    and call it Love.

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    May 19th, 2011

  24. Staci

    Drove my John Deere
    To the store
    With my boobies saggin
    To the floor
    In my reflection on the tv,
    I saw
    I left home again without
    A bra
    That’s ok, I have
    No fear
    Cause nothin runs like a Deere!

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    May 19th, 2011

  25. Riz

    Yellow and green with a deer!
    I think I shall tattoo you here,
    They say I am trashy I know that I’m white
    But dammit I love riding that tractor every night
    That sexy rumble between my thighs
    As me and Bubba say our goodbyes
    There are no worries, there is no strife
    You don’t know what you’re missin’
    If you don’t live a John Deere life!

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    May 19th, 2011

  26. that`s not a poem, it`s instructions on how she want`s to be rode

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    May 19th, 2011

  27. Snap N. McGarrett

    Cool. Something to read while banging her. How thoughtful.

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    May 19th, 2011

  28. Why it’s not good to ask for a tattoo that will entertain a hot redneck, and then pass out on the table.

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    May 19th, 2011

  29. Margaret in NJ

    I’d really like a close up of the poem on her back….Love to know what it says

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    May 19th, 2011

  30. Mtnsunshine

    I can’t poetize to save my life, but I CAN read tiny blurry print. It says:

    “We’re all a little weird. Life is weird. When you find someone who’s weirdness is compatible with yours, you join in combined weirdness and call it Love.”

    I wonder if she found her compatible weird..

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    May 19th, 2011

  31. yoyoma

    We’re all a little weird
    Life is weird
    When you find someone whose weirdness
    Is compatible with your own
    You join in mutual weirdness
    And call it love

    This is actually the tattoo on her back, give or take. I’ve always liked the poem, originally from Dr. Seuss I believe? That is, I’ve always liked it until now. Even though the tattoo is, in itself, a proclamation of the poem’s fundemental meaning, now I’m just more fearful for the future of humanity :o)

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    May 19th, 2011

  32. MasterKaters

    Dear John Deere you rock my (wally) world
    I’d rather ride you then be somebody’s girl
    My cousin might be taken
    But my loins are still achin’
    So I’m countin’ on you to make my toes curl

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    May 19th, 2011

  33. NiferS

    Herpes are itchy
    Herpes are painful
    The burning I fear came from my John Deere
    At least that’s what i hear
    from my boyfriend…

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    May 19th, 2011

  34. Erin B.

    The Epic Tragedy of Laurie
    _________________________________

    Listen up kids and I’ll tell you a tale that will surely strike you with fear
    It’s the legend of Laurie
    This sad little story
    About how she can run like a Deere

    Born on a farm in ’89, Laurie emerged from the womb
    The doc slapped her mother
    And then ran for cover
    Sure that his eyes had been ruined

    Then one tragic day in 2009 she learned of something quite scary
    Her dad died from the Gout
    And her mom told her about
    How they thought there were having a Larry

    Emotionally scarred and crying like mad she did the only thing she could think:
    She ran to the harbor
    Found a tattoo parlor
    And tried to get manly via ink

    She found a tat artist who would try his hardest
    To draw the manliest thing he could find
    When she looked in the mirror ‘twas apparently clear
    That a yellow deer came to his mind

    This tacky tattoo cost her more than was due, a $600 mistake
    But just look from behind because trust me, you’ll find
    It’s a much sweeter sight than her face

    True is the story of poor little Laurie who was meant to be Larry, at first
    But ask no more questions
    And do learn a lesson
    John Deere tattoos look stupid on anyone. Please put a better shirt on.

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    May 19th, 2011

  35. DEAR JOHN, i`m leaving you in your john deere in the hopes that the only thing you fear are the lonly nites you`ll spend without us near so while you sit alone and cry as to how you want us near remember i have your beloved john deere

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    May 19th, 2011

  36. TWEETY

    OH MY SWEET JOHN DEERE
    YOU ARE BETTER THEN ANY CHEAP BEER
    YOU MOW AND HALL
    BETTER THEN ANY OF YOU ALL
    IT WAS LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT
    I WANT TO RIDE YOU ALL NIGHT
    EVERY TIME I SHARPEN YOUR BLADES
    REMINDS ME OF COUSIN SADES……..
    THE REASON I NOW HAVE A.I.D.S.

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    May 19th, 2011

  37. Kelsey

    Spring, Summer, Winter or Fall,
    I come-a ridin’ right past the mall,
    to my most favorite place in the whole wide world,
    the place of mullets, naked chicks and fat girls,
    I would never get there if weren’t for you, John,
    your tractor has kept me movin’ along,
    though i don’t use you for your original duty,
    I can ride to Walmart while I show a little booty:)

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    May 19th, 2011

  38. Mark

    “We are all a little weird and life’s a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.”

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    May 19th, 2011

  39. Mike Butler

    O John Deere
    I love you so
    With your riding mower
    My lawn I do mow

    You take me places
    When my car don’t wanna
    You cause that cut grass smells
    almost as good as marijuana

    Your yeller and green colors
    are so beautiful to me
    Another brand of tractor
    An owner I will never be

    You also make
    My awesome hay baler
    I use it to to harvest
    The weed behind my trailer

    O Sweet John Deere
    Your so close to my heart
    I love you almost
    As my local Wal-Mart

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    May 19th, 2011

  40. Dylan

    My girl drives a tractor
    And lives in a trailer,
    When we get to trucking,
    You know that I rail her,

    She humms like a Gator,
    When I turn her on,
    When we get to shucking,
    She butters my corn,

    She’s a strait up rear loader,
    Don’t call her that though,
    Cause like Gwen Stefani,
    She ain’t no holla backhoe.

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    May 19th, 2011

  41. O John Deere
    I love you so
    With your riding mower
    My lawn I do mow

    You take me places
    When my car don’t wanna
    You cause that cut grass that smells
    almost as good as marijuana

    Your yeller and green colors
    are so beautiful to me
    Another brand of tractor
    An owner I will never be

    You also make
    My awesome hay baler
    I use it to to harvest
    The weed behind my trailer

    O Sweet John Deere
    Your so close to my heart
    I love you almost
    As my local Wal-Mart

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    May 19th, 2011

  42. Branden B

    John Deere, John Deere
    I will forever keep you near
    Without this tattoo
    Hubby would ne’er look at my rear

    All 12 Children, from Cletus to Clem
    Were brought to this world
    on our green and yellow gem

    Don’t Blame me, he thinks it’s hot
    When our John Deere hauls me
    across our 20×20 Trailer Park Lot

    I always wonder what more I could do
    to prove my undying tractor love
    on top of getting this prison tattoo

    Want to see love straight from the heart?
    Come see me and Ol Johnny Boy,
    We Live right by Walmart

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    May 19th, 2011

  43. william vandiver

    hey everyone wants to ride a deere

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  44. Tiffany

    what it really says is

    “We are all a little weird and life’s a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.”

    this makes it even weirder tho because she is in love with a tractor…

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    May 19th, 2011

  45. Mandy

    We met at the tractor pull.
    He asked for a dip of my Skoal.
    And over our shared spit cup,
    my broke heart got all whole.
    When folks say nothing runs like a Deere,
    let me tell ya’ll, that shore is so.
    They farm the crops that make my dip
    and fetched my true love, Jimmy Joe!

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    May 19th, 2011

  46. jsska

    J is for the jimson weed.. you mow down in my yard
    O is for the octane.. I purchase on Mom’s card
    H is for the happiness.. I get from riding you
    N is for my neighbors.. who like to ride you too
    D is for debatable.. regarding this tattoo
    E is for efficient.. the kind of job you do
    E is for the ecstasy.. I ate before we met
    R is for regrettable.. you know? Regret
    The other E is extra.. I don’t know why it’s there
    But even when I’m sixty-three.. my Deere will still be there

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    May 19th, 2011

  47. Epik

    You think I’m trashy, I think I’m flashy
    With John Deere on the back, and you can’t see the rack
    flack, tact, ya’ll are whack
    leave me be, you just don’t see
    I give chubs to your hubs while i’m buyin my grubs
    they want to leer,
    and get a tear,
    when they look at my Deere

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    May 19th, 2011

  48. Cooney

    There once was a tractor named Deere,
    That ran just on wisky and beer.
    It would cut my grass
    And it held my big ass
    That men liked to take from the rear.

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  49. Sara

    Oh the days can be long when running a tractor
    The weather outside always plays a factor
    Whether it be barley, oats, or wheat
    A good harvest is really hard to beat
    My favorite thing in the world is my John Deere
    Followed closely by drinking a can of ice cold beer

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  50. Brandi K.

    Once upon a time in a far away land
    A redneck girl came upon a creature so grand
    She scrunched her eyebrow, and said, “What’s that yonder?”
    And with her few brain cells, began to ponder
    What was this thing that she had never seen
    With “big o’ circle legs” and a color of green?
    Along came a farmer, he knew what it was
    He tried to explain, but her brain was afuzz
    The farmer gave up, and mounted the beast
    With the speed set on “turtle” he began to head east
    He rode away slowly, so the redneck would hear
    “Just remember one thing! Nothin’ runs like a Deere!”
    The redneck girl began to head home
    Driving away in her truck of red and chrome
    “Dad gum!” she exclaimed, “that thing sure was purty,
    Even iffin’ it was jest a l’il bit dirty.”
    So proud she discovered something so new
    She decided to get herself a tattoo
    “Jus’ ‘tween my fat shoulders, ther’s plenty o’ room!”
    So off to the parlor she started to zoom
    As she bared the needle of the artist named Tom,
    She said, “Bet this’ll get me on peopleofwalmart.com!”

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    May 19th, 2011

  51. Ricky Bobby

    Tractor seat I be sitting
    Green green paint I love
    Chewing juice I be spitting.

    Haiku 7-5-7

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    May 19th, 2011

  52. Jimmy

    John Deere on my back
    Last time I shall make a bet
    While drunk on Zima Gold

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    May 19th, 2011

  53. madz1962

    There once wsa a mower – John Deere
    I could easily manouver and steer
    So proudly I sat
    And unveiled my tat
    And washed down a 12 pack of beer.

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    May 19th, 2011

  54. Jay_Dee

    Deere John Deere:

    Imma cewt gurl frum Adlanna Gorga
    Yer lowgo maks mi a hora
    Wen I sea thos guyz riden yer trakter
    Tha wauter bilds apon tha snaper.
    I plays yer lowgo wif pried en ma bak
    fer thos sam guyz two sea, raylin mi frum beehind en tha sak.

    Luv Lucia Jean

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    May 19th, 2011

  55. steve

    Nothing runs like a deer . I really do love the way it stick steers . I just get on and start off real slow . Then step on the gas off to walmart I’ll go. At walmat I never feel out of place when I;m parking my mower in a handiecapped space. Then I go in and get on a motorized cart its not like my deer but it dose it;s part. I gather my goodies then back on my deer . Its a good thing my baby put on a luggage here . Then its back home I’ll go and one is clear its true what they say nothing runs like a deer !

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    May 19th, 2011

  56. kristie

    this is JOhn Deere, I love him, so, HE makes me happy when I”m feeling low.he cuts the grass he spanks my ass, I fill him up when he is out of gas, he never talks back, as long as I give him long grass. I had the ride of my life,and I never felt like this before I swear this is true and I owe it all to my DEERE.

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    May 19th, 2011

  57. KELS~

    HAD MY FIRST THRILL
    WITH A MAN LEER
    HE LAID ME BACK
    ON HIS JOHN DEER
    THE ENGINE WAS REV’N
    WE WERE A LOVIN’
    YEAH THOSE WERE THE DAYS
    A PUSHIN’ AND A SHOVIN’

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    May 19th, 2011

  58. yuki

    I know this person and her tat, the words are about love; and who is to say you cant love your john deer.

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    May 19th, 2011

  59. john

    Looks like a john
    smells like a john
    must be a john

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    May 19th, 2011

  60. Brandi K.

    Once upon a time in a far away land
    A redneck girl came upon a creature so grand
    She scrunched her eyebrow, and said, “What’s that yonder?”
    And with her few brain cells, began to ponder
    What was this thing that she had never seen
    With “big o’ circle legs” and a color of green?
    Along came a farmer, he knew what it was
    He tried to explain, but her brain was afuzz
    The farmer gave up, and mounted the beast
    With the speed set on “turtle” he began to head east
    He rode away slowly, so the redneck would hear
    “Just remember one thing! Nothin’ runs like a Deere!”
    The redneck girl began to head home
    Driving away in her truck of red and chrome
    “Dad gum!” she exclaimed, “that thing sure was purty,
    Even iffin’ it was jest a l’il bit dirty.”
    So proud she discovered something so new
    She decided to get herself a tattoo
    “Jus’ ‘tween my fat shoulders, ther’s plenty o’ room!”
    So off to the parlor she started to zoom
    As she bared the needle of the artist named Tom,
    She said, “Bet this’ll get me on peopleofwalmart.com!”

    (The rest is just history…that I would most likely not want to hear.)

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    May 19th, 2011

  61. Mr Rollback

    I wanted a logo of the famous John Deere
    Tattoo’d all over my fat ol’ rear
    But alas and alack, my friends all told me
    That to see MY rear there must be a fee
    So I put it on my back, after I had another beer

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    May 19th, 2011

  62. nano

    Oh Deere Oh Deere
    The place I was conceived
    The place I was born
    How I learned to drive
    How I got to prom
    You finally left this world
    Now running on premium gas in tractor heaven

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    May 19th, 2011

  63. Amie

    I love my John Deere, it runs like a champ, its easy to steer.
    With plumber crack out, I crank up and shout, “Get me a Natty, pass me a fatty!”
    It’s off to Wal-Mart to fill up my cart with Hot Rod and gun mags, and for the Missus some shop rags.
    I get back on ole’ yellow and green, what a damn fine machine.
    With everyone lookin, I know what they are thinkin, “I gotta get me one of those.”
    To finish this off I say to John Deere, this is my ode.

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    May 19th, 2011

  64. Regina H.

    My truck has curtains, my tractor has slats
    My back has boobs, my neck has tats.
    Don’t come a knocking if my trailer is rocking.
    And don’t come to plow, if you don’t know how.

    Double wide in the countryside—
    Daisy dukes and skinny jeans
    Dollar General and Walmart dreams
    John Deer– found not here
    Sears mower, weed grower.

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    May 19th, 2011

  65. Bob Smith

    With this Deere, I the Wed
    Witnessed by Uncle Fester and Uncle Ned,
    My dad see’s him as a little horney,
    And says this tattoo’s a little corny.
    All I know is there is no glory,
    Until you reach around and see I’m a Cory!

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    May 19th, 2011

  66. KEVIN

    Is that? It may be the pledge to Dwayne The Rock Johnson Team BRING IT……….

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    May 19th, 2011

  67. grim reaper

    roses are red ,john deeres are green i stepped in shit while iwas getting mine clean.walked too the barn, too get my shoes clean i caught my wife with charlie sheen.

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    May 19th, 2011

  68. Falconv6

    Beth is def. the winner. You go girl!

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    May 19th, 2011

  69. jordan

    rode it hard
    busted it wide open
    left smelling of grass
    nothing runs like a deer

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    May 19th, 2011

  70. energizer

    @Beth, MasterKaters, Cooney, and Brandi K.

    All of you guys are great. Laughed my ass off. Lots of talent there. I can do a lot of things, but write poetry isn’t one of them. Kudos.
    :-)

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    May 19th, 2011

  71. Kevin

    I won’t try to guess what the words are although maybe she had a boyfriend in the Army and was trying to express a Dear John letter in a perverted kind of way. More than likely she is thinking, “Where in the hell is that Tylenol? I can’t believe I got so drunk with that tractor salesman last night at the pool hall. Hey! Why is my back itchin so much?

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    May 19th, 2011

  72. sara

    she needs to shave her neck

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    May 19th, 2011

  73. Barbelith

    I’m sure it’s just the lyrics to Freebird.

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    May 19th, 2011

  74. Blu

    Well, I sent my dear lady up to wally world,
    To brave through hordes of scantily dressed girl,
    I sent that there lady to fetch me some beer,
    That there lady with the mark of John Deere.
    Hope she gets back soon, before my show starts,
    And brings some febreze, ’cause I got the farts.
    The dog, he needs walking,
    And the kids be a’squawking
    So that lady better get on her mower,
    Unless they did tow her,
    My dear lady with the mark of John Deere.

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    May 19th, 2011

  75. David

    No poem, just a comment: Friends don’t let friends ride on red tractors. I guess that would go for cooters too!

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    May 19th, 2011

  76. Brad

    If you are reading this from my rear,
    and you climax is coming near.
    Please don’t run like a Deere.
    Stay with me here.
    Be my dear.

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    May 19th, 2011

  77. signguy

    Man, what a website… even got Simon Cowell to come over.

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    May 19th, 2011

  78. forbidmenot

    I think that I shall never se… ok, wait… wait… I thought that i would…. aww, fckit

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    May 19th, 2011

  79. bleu

    Whoever unleashed all this will be held responsible…….

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    May 19th, 2011

  80. LJH

    Do people read any of the posts before posting their own? I get it, it is a Dr. Suess quote.

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    May 19th, 2011

  81. Jen

    “Nothing runs like a deere”…..and that deere wishes it could run away from this bad tattoo.

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    May 19th, 2011

  82. Amy

    Got a tractor so greene and a man who’s not,
    love to ride them both, it gets me so hot.
    Their both one in a million both got that charm,
    my John Deere tractor, and my man at the farm.

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    May 19th, 2011

  83. Rob Butler

    Roses are red,
    John Deeres are green,
    And I am the trailer park
    Thrashin’ machine.

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    May 19th, 2011

  84. Sean Roy

    Dear John Deere
    I miss having you near
    But my addiction to crack
    requires funds which I lack
    and I can’t smoke the one in my rear

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    May 19th, 2011

  85. J.A.S.

    Run John Deere Tractor, Run
    ————————————-
    My John Deere tractor
    has always been a factor
    in everything I do all day
    I just love the Green
    Of that farm machine
    cause……. it helps the bills get paid!

    Whether tilling the soil
    or changing the oil
    you will always see my smiling face
    morning till night
    John Deere makes things right
    and keeps me out of that City Rat Race

    Run tractor run
    Run tractor run
    Mornin’ till night
    John Deere makes things right
    Run Tractor Run, Run, Run.

    I got John Deere gloves
    I got a J.D. cap
    got it made don’t have any cares
    I go to sleep at Night
    feeling oh so right…………….
    wearin’ John Deere underwear!

    Run tractor run
    Run tractor run
    Mornin’ till night
    John Deere makes things right
    Run Tractor Run

    There are several more verses.
    Yes, I wrote it.
    J.A.S.

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    May 20th, 2011

  86. Mork

    There had to be a lot of alchohol involved in the decision to get a tractor logo permanently etched on her body.

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    May 20th, 2011

  87. PhillyFlash 73

    I came to get beer
    Nothing runs like a John Deere
    So place your ad here

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    May 20th, 2011

  88. DP

    There once was a woman in Wal-Mart
    Had some poetry tattooed as her back-Art.
    John Deere logo intact, she took all the flack
    from the comments at People Of Wal-Mart.

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    May 20th, 2011

  89. Aaron E. Muze

    WTF is with this shit? FIX YOUR UPLOAD COMPRESSION ALGORITHM! I can’t see shit.

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    May 20th, 2011

  90. Doober

    Roses are red, ivy is green.
    I get my kicks from the washing machine.

    Roses are red and loom larged the the ant.
    We nested our trailer near the waste treatment plant.

    Roses are red then they turn brown.
    I once got felt up by a rodeo clown.

    Roses are red and smell like perfume.
    My uterus resembles the temple of doom.

    Rosers arr read and rotten wons stunk.
    I rote this here poem welst I wuz drunk.

    Roses are red and my Deere is green.
    Don’t talk no shit or I’ll has to get mean…

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    May 20th, 2011

  91. Brian

    Green is the color of John Deere…

    Having a a tattoo of it is queer…

    Her parents are sibings I fear…

    If she was in my way toward her I would veer…

    The world is better with out her it’s clear…

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    May 20th, 2011

  92. Ash

    Kricket,

    you have a very nice John Deere tat on your back.

    Thanks for sharing your quote with us at Wal-mart.

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    May 20th, 2011

  93. Morgan

    Did anyone notice that her tattoo is misspelled???

    The quote is:

    We’re all a little weird. Life’s a little weird. When you find someone whose weirdness is compatible with yours, You join in combined weirdness and call it Love.

    Her tattoo reads:

    We’re all a little weird. Life’s a little weird When you find someone WHO’S weirdness is compatible with yours you join in combined weirdness and call it Love.

    Bad paid for misspelled tattoos!!!!

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    May 20th, 2011

  94. Ode To My Deere

    My Grandpa’s lawn you do mow
    The Fall Leaves you turn to mulch

    Turning the ground for the crop of maters
    Or helping our illegal brothers harvest the taters

    Where ever I roam you are not far
    John Deere is the make of my car

    To you Deere John my heart I will owe
    But by any other name, a hoe is a hoe

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    May 20th, 2011

  95. GLWarm

    There once was a John named Deere
    Who banged a young lass in the rear
    While he was there
    he found her back bare
    so he left this tattoo right here.

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    May 21st, 2011

  96. Purdy Birdy

    I have the same dress as that chick.
    I think I’m gonna burn it now.

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    May 22nd, 2011

  97. JulsinCA

    John Deere’s are green
    Catapillar’s are yellow.
    I hope this tattoo gets me a fellow.

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    May 23rd, 2011

  98. Shea

    Pappy’s ol’ Bess was settin’ in th’ bog
    My eyes bugged out like a stomped on toad frog
    I ain’t seen her since th’ last hog tyin’
    And I knowed she could be fix up right fine.
    A little duct tape and she’s ready for haulin’ beer,
    ‘Cause my Billy Joe Bob loves see me on a John Deere.

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    May 24th, 2011

  99. Bob Moore

    When high, life’s good
    Life is hard when you
    find yourself inked unflatteringly
    by redneck iconoclastic images.
    You’ve failed in artistic endeavors
    and failed in life

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    May 24th, 2011

  100. Dawn

    You may think its queer
    how I love John Deer
    but I got a tat
    apond my back
    after drinking too much beer!

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    May 24th, 2011

  101. MasterKaters

    Not gonna lie some of these made me pee a little.

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    May 25th, 2011

  102. Tony

    Now wait a minute!!!! The poor lady probably thought it was her family crest

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    May 25th, 2011

  103. Nikki

    There once was a girl
    whose family was her whole world
    her cousin joe she was banging
    with her boobs a hanging
    9 months later came baby
    and she thought just maybe
    could it be dad’s
    or maybe uncle nad’s
    oh well ill take me deere
    and leave straight from here
    and ride it for life
    cause nothing runs like a deere…..

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    May 26th, 2011

  104. Tish

    John Deere, to me you are so dear.
    With you, I never live in fear.
    You make my grass look nice.
    But that will not suffice.
    I want to ride you all day long.
    While wearing a John Deere thong.
    If this is something you like,
    then John Deere custom paint your bike.

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    May 26th, 2011

  105. gotbike

    Deere John…

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    May 27th, 2011

  106. joel

    oh my john deere i keep so near,
    not to low or close to my rear,
    the reason is when the boys come round,
    is i dont lay on my back,
    i set on my knees so the boys can hitch to my rear

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    May 27th, 2011

  107. Steph

    This just in: Britney Spears has a new man in her life! And she got a tattoo to celebrate the occasion.

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    May 31st, 2011

  108. Wayne

    Weird for John Deere,
    Had too much beer,
    Exposed my rear,
    Bent over that Deere,
    Billy Ray says its fate,
    Doc says I’m late,
    Tat sounded great,
    To comsumate.

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    June 7th, 2011

  109. Gmoney

    This stag is actually an SCA symbol for a group that she belongs to (or is from) called the Outlands. Its a history group. Maybe she shouldn’t be made fun of for it. Well, just a little.

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    June 11th, 2011

  110. leviathan451

    I went to high school with a girl that had song lyrics tatooed in GIANT letters across the center of her chest. Do people know tatoos don’t wash off?

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    June 20th, 2011

  111. Dragon

    Daddy working late one day
    Upon his John Deere tractor
    And even though it’s true, they say
    The beer was not a factor
    He rolled across a gopher hole
    Got tossed into the shredder
    Now I can ride that green machine
    So I guess it’s for the better

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    August 5th, 2011

  112. katie

    I bet her boy friend payed for this one… She must think his tractor is sexy, and he he needed something to read while he Humped her fat a$$…

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    September 28th, 2011

  113. carolinacountrygirl

    I don’t see what’s so trashy about having a john deere tattoo.If she likes it enough to put it on her body perminitaly then it’s something she loves. hell, I’d do it. we are from the south and like to show to what we love.

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    December 23rd, 2011

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