Cotton Eye Joe



By the looks of it, I presume he is proficient in both hippie hacky-sack and moonshine jug band music…that’s talent.

New York

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Cotton Eye Joe, 8.6 out of 10 based on 16 ratings

97 Comments, Comment or Ping

  1. elbonedeedo

    Can you imagine how bad that nasty rat’s nest of hair smells. Daaammmn

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    July 13th, 2011

  2. MistressT

    All of a sudden, I can hear creepy banjo music starting to play in the background….

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    July 13th, 2011

  3. Cyndi

    One can of Mt. Dew too many….

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    July 13th, 2011

  4. Tera

    Looks like a turd…LOL!

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    July 13th, 2011

  5. the chicky

    Looks like he is peeing on the floor!!

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    July 13th, 2011

  6. Syko

    Over in haircare, you can find scissors, brushes, and combs! I suggest USING THEM! (in addition to shampoo and soap)

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    July 13th, 2011

  7. TheMother

    A moment for a prayer of thanks before we enter the produce department?

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    July 13th, 2011

  8. vikster

    OMG how much do i wanna grab the scissors !!!!!

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    July 13th, 2011

  9. mike t

    hillbilly chic.

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    July 13th, 2011

  10. Bonnie Mac

    I can smell him from here… :P

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    July 13th, 2011

  11. troy

    Is Phish playing here?

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    July 13th, 2011

  12. K-Dog

    A redneck Bob Marley fan?

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    July 13th, 2011

  13. Steve

    Is it me or is he taking a piss?

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    July 13th, 2011

  14. Goddess

    Just makes me want to run up with a pair of scissors and cut that shit off. Blech!

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    July 13th, 2011

  15. Digi

    Wonder what him and that kid are looking down at? I mean I’m shocked the kid isn’t staring at the dude screaming in terror.

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    July 13th, 2011

  16. Branden B

    I wonder if he flings that shit-lok between his legs and flosses himself dry after his yearly shower

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    July 13th, 2011

  17. Oh my

    The child seems impressed.

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    July 13th, 2011

  18. Branden B

    I wonder if he flings that turd-lok between his legs and flosses himself dry after his yearly shower

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    July 13th, 2011

  19. girl watcher

    My god! Why is he carrying a bag of squirrels on his head?!

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    July 13th, 2011

  20. John Smiley

    Looks like he is getting ready to relieve himself right there by the self checkout!!

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    July 13th, 2011

  21. Luxie

    MOUNTAIN MAN! =O

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    July 13th, 2011

  22. maton

    Rob Zombie’s really let himself go.

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    July 13th, 2011

  23. pswap

    New York??? Seriously?

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    July 13th, 2011

  24. energizer

    “Hey kid, watch this!”

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    July 13th, 2011

  25. Abby

    did a snake eat some of his hair and die half way up?

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    July 13th, 2011

  26. BirdM4n33

    Must have been visiting relatives in New York, cuz I can’t imagine there are deep enough back woods for him to dwell in!

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    July 13th, 2011

  27. OH MY GOODNESS!!!!

    That’s just nasty! WHY on earth would you allow yourself to go like this? Maybe he doesn’t care but – UGH! How could you stand yourself???????

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    July 13th, 2011

  28. WTF I'M AN A**HOLE

    Daniel Boone was a man, yes a big man, and he fought for America to keep all Americans free… This ain’t him. Daniel Boone wore a coon skin hat, not a squirrels nest on his head. Smell ya later gator!

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    July 13th, 2011

  29. Gary Jones

    That little girl is going to be sooo embarrassed when she gets older and someone asks, “who’s your daddy?”

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    July 13th, 2011

  30. FlamingoNut

    Wow, some of you really don’t think there’s inbred hicks in NY? Hell yeah…

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    July 13th, 2011

  31. Fly on the Wall

    Plenty of woods in upstate New York. This photo was not taken near New York City.

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    July 13th, 2011

  32. seriously!!!!!!

    You shore do got a purdy mouth!!!

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    July 13th, 2011

  33. jpark

    Looks like he is playing with himself !!

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    July 13th, 2011

  34. nicholas is here

    hey granny i think we r n heaven. they have every thing here. for get bevely hills.

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    July 13th, 2011

  35. “Being “cotton eyed” refers to a person with cataracts. Does this man have any ocular problems I can’t see in this picture? However, I do think he could fit in with the Swedish band Rednex. I can almost hear him wailing “Pop An Old Oak” and “The Way I Mate.”

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    July 13th, 2011

  36. Buzz Kill

    Cletus: We home school ‘em. I teach the big ones, and the big ones teach the little ones, but nobody taught me, so the whole thing is an exercise in futility.

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    July 13th, 2011

  37. rblackb

    and he’s got a raccoon in a cage right outside the trailer door

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    July 13th, 2011

  38. bleu

    How many quarters does it take to put him through the car wash

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    July 13th, 2011

  39. Dark Eyes

    Is that something growing out of his head or his ass? I’m confused.

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    July 13th, 2011

  40. Dave

    Seriously Dude? every time you have to take a dump you gotta deal with that……..thing hangin from your head, a woman I can see dealing with that shit,but not a guy!…………………….you are a guy right?

    If you are………pass your guy card forward, I don’t think you deserve it.

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    July 13th, 2011

  41. mike

    didn’t Aunt Mommy ever tell him to cut his hair?

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    July 13th, 2011

  42. Donna R

    I think maybe this is a relative of the woman in Ariz. with the same hairdo…

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    July 13th, 2011

  43. He needs to be tackled and hauled off for a COMPLETE makeover !!!

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    July 13th, 2011

  44. Oh!Lady

    I don’t think he was purposely trying to grow dreadlocks, I think he just lost his “COMB” for about (thirty) 30 years.

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    July 13th, 2011

  45. scroti mcboogerballs

    Where did ya come from, please wont ya go? Where did ya come from, cotton eye joe

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    July 13th, 2011

  46. Jen

    Cleaned out the gun department for his night of huntin’ coon.

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  47. patti

    This is why I am always hesitant to buy produce at Walmart…

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    July 13th, 2011

  48. Brian

    What the ——- is eating his head?

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    July 13th, 2011

  49. Kevin Lee Smith

    OMG that is the tackiest shirt ! They don’t even go with those bibs!

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  50. that rats nest is so nasty you will need hedge clippers to cut it!!

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    July 13th, 2011

  51. madz1962

    Take a moment to think about what the inside of his shower drain looks like Yep, thought that would make you queasy.

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  52. stupidtalk

    please don’t show me where it tickles when it dangles.

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  53. Mea

    What is he doing with his hands that the kid is so interested in?

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  54. energizer

    That’s Grizzly Adams’ brother, “Gnarrly”.

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    July 13th, 2011

  55. DaNell

    Is that a coon you threw over your shoulder?

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  56. Northerngirl

    Oh, gee, it’s one of the cast of “Deliverance”!

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  57. dave

    I wouldnt want to get close enuf to use a scissors. The bugs would get me. Now maybe a.guillotine…..

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  58. Michelle

    His hair is beyond nasty and disgusting! He had to have been growing that thing on his head for a long time to get it looking like that! Still nasty! After he uses the scissors, he should just take a straight buzz cutter to it and get rid of it all! I am also guessing that all that stuff weighs down on his neck and probably hurts like hell! Just cut it off!

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    July 13th, 2011

  59. the mexican

    This pic alone is sufficient to warrant a little visit from CPS. I suspect he is capable of anything.

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  60. K

    Is that the guy from Deliverance?

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  61. damn i am asshamed for them kids lmao!!!

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  62. jones*jungle

    Gross! A bottle of Nair would do wonders.

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  63. Layla

    OMG!!! It’s eating his head!!

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    July 13th, 2011

  64. BOBO

    Shopping at Walmart…….Soooooo easy even a caveman can do it !

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  65. jersygrl

    PLEASE get the hell out of the produce department!!!

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  66. Isotopia

    Here in California we call hair like that ‘shitlocks’ – especially if you live in or around Santa Cruz.

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    July 13th, 2011

  67. Jen

    The guys from Deliverance called – they said they miss you.

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  68. goose

    That little girl is sure checking out whatever he has in his hands.

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  69. Leonie

    Hot damn I want that man!!!!

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    July 14th, 2011

  70. Katie

    banjo is a playin and someones yellin squeal like a pig!

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    July 14th, 2011

  71. AZMike

    Why do I suddenly have the song “Come on Eileen” playing in my head?

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  72. David Ahart

    I see this comes from NY. Someone who came for Woodstock in ’69 and never left, i bet!

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  73. Brian

    From th elook of it, I presume he’s crawling with fleas…

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  74. rphinks

    What if that is not hair, but some sort of alien brain sack? He could be a super intelligent visitor from another world!

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  75. energizer

    “Hellbilly Deluxe”

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    July 14th, 2011

  76. Lynnard

    I’m sorry, y’all.. that’s just NASTY!

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    July 14th, 2011

  77. Ras

    Am I the only one who’s noticed that his hairmess has been crafted into living (sort of) macrame?

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    July 15th, 2011

  78. Oh!Lady

    When they said grow your hair long to donate to “Locks of Love”, this is not what they meant!!!!!!!!

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    July 15th, 2011

  79. Hogboy

    You should see his ass dreads!!!

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    July 15th, 2011

  80. big D

    Is that Joe Dirt’s Dad?

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    July 16th, 2011

  81. Cynthia

    That “Thing” is called a Polish Plait. And yes they are usually infested. I googled it and it is even more gross than it looks. Oh oh that smell, can’t ya smell that smell?

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    July 19th, 2011

  82. nerual

    -claps and stomps foot rhythmically-
    If it hadn’t been for Cotton Eye Joe, I’d been married a long time ago, where didja come from where didja go? where didja come from Cotton Eye Joe?

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    July 20th, 2011

  83. pbunyon

    I suppose “Locks of Love” would actually reject some folks donations.

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    July 21st, 2011

  84. Aymeesue

    DELIVERANCE………..

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    July 22nd, 2011

  85. Jessica

    Is that hair growing out of his ass to meet his head or the other way around?

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    July 24th, 2011

  86. Caitlyn

    Does anyone know this guy or how to contact him??? I work at a daytime talk show and would like to give him a FREE MAKEOVER!!! If anyone knows anything about him or knows any man [Living in NJ, NY, or CT] that needs a makeover please email me!!!

    daytimetvbooker@gmail.com

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    July 25th, 2011

  87. ash

    dirty ass white people.

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    July 26th, 2011

  88. Aunty Entity

    Red Right….. naaaasty

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    July 27th, 2011

  89. daffygrl

    All I can think of is how heavy (and dirty and stinky and nasty) that must be…and then I checked out the hillbilly getup – yoiks.

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    July 28th, 2011

  90. SouthernPrincess

    Please don’t let him squeeze the produce!

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    July 30th, 2011

  91. Retina Burn

    @ Madz1962… by the look of it his shower drain probably hasnt had running water in it in a long long time!

    @ Cynthia, wow, I had no idea this “hair style”???? had any kind of name for it, but I also looked up “Polish Plait”… & those links look both interesting & smelly!

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    August 6th, 2011

  92. Brad in Canada

    Born on a mountain, raised in a cave, farting and shopping are all I crave,,,,

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    August 9th, 2011

  93. danny

    another dreadneck @ walmart…lol

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    August 13th, 2011

  94. cantonchick

    I actually know this guy. he sells his produce at the local farmers market in canton NY. he is always covered in dirt and looks as if he never showers. the dred is actually much longer and thicker now, believe it or not. its almost a foot in width and its down to his legs. he doesnt smell bad, really. he is just funny to look at.

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    October 11th, 2011

  95. hooker

    didnt know that they had a Wallymart in the Black Hills

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    October 21st, 2011

  96. gsavage777

    Wow, an asshat that grows upward to your head! Hey, bend over, I wanna see the roots!! UGLY Dreadful Locks.

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    November 18th, 2011

  97. Dear lord should I pick up that penney,and if I do will I look desperate ??

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    January 3rd, 2012

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