If by “My Junk” you are referring to your penis, that will be awfully tough considering fluorescent orange cowboy hates make me rock hard.
45 Comments | In: Featured Creature, Funny, Nevada, Walmart Fashion
January 26th, 2012
LooooooooooooooooooooVE IT! LOL Seriously…..thinking…NO ONE IS GONNA WANN TOUCH YOUR JUNK DUDE! LOL
Is junk another word for plastic hat?
Hats or hates?
…there’s your sign.
I hate orange cowboy HATES to.
In addition to everything else that’s wrong here, does he have his flourescent hat on backwards? Gotta’ have words with whoever dresses this guy!
Slop Jar Magoo
He be lookin’ for a Walmart “HO”……
Whachya gonna do with all that junk, all that junk inside your trunk… not touch it!
Not a problem….
no problem buddy.. believe me, your junk is safe
yeah… hold me back.
Usually a reference to TSA policies … wonder what words the red tape is covering ?
“This goes out to all those big ladies who wanna steal my electric scooter.”
One man’s junk is another man’s trash.
I don’t plan on it, Pops.
He was the hair designer known among the fashion world as Hans the hair soloist or “Hans Solo”.
Mr. Know It All
Another one who thinks he is a babe magnet
Must be rusty junk
journey back to oz
His secret is safe from me. I’m not coming anywhere near his junk!
as a side note ….the hat’s on backwards.
He’s a bit bitter because he found out his family just submitted him to be on the next season of “Hoarders”.
I don’t think anyone would want to touch that corroded “junk!”
Maybe he’s just tired of all the old ladies molesting him in the nursing home.
Some wild stuff goes on in some of them.
Dude, your junk is safe without the sign.
Wouldn’t only want to NOT touch his Junk, but I wouldn’t even want see his Junk yard
I can’t help but wonder if he’s a couple french fries short of a Happy Meal.
Oh , its Fred Sandford
icy the humor
not with a ten foot pole
Is it possible to pay in advance for a hitman to do his handiwork when he sees that you’re completely oblivious to the fact that you’re acting in such a manner that almost makes it a certainty that you will become a Walcreature?
Son of Sam's Club
homo habilis phobia
January 27th, 2012
one person’s junk is another one’s treasure
Suzie Q. Wacvet
Not a problem!
With the crazy colored hat and the salt n pepper hair, it looks like it could be Willy the Pimp. That might explain the jacket.
Last few times we’ve seen him, he was looking like he was feeling his age. Sure hope he’s still on his feet and that this isn’t him.
Don’t worry, Pee-Paw. We won’t! Nor will anyone else LOL
well one it’s HATS not HATES and besides i only see one HAT so it wouldn’t even be HATS let alone HATES
March 3rd, 2012
He’s got the cowboy hat on BACKWARDS. By the way, that cowboy hat is actually a hardhat, like construction workers wear, only in cowboy hat shape.
March 6th, 2012
This guy is actually a millionaire from boulder city nevada. The “dont touch my junk” is reffering to all the antique “junk” that he has collected over the years and made major bucks off of! He is a crazy ass old man though!
March 23rd, 2012
This guy is my neighbor. He lives up the alley from me. All of his cars say ‘tail gating is a big NO NO’ and he wears that orange hat EVERYWHERE.
March 8th, 2013
That’s Johnny! He’s 86 and in pretty good shape. He drives a Honda sports coupe in the winter and rides a Yamaha Zuma scooter the rest of the year, often towing a small trailer for his “junk.” He’s a WWII Navy vet of many Pacific battles and was a bartender in Laguna Beach for years and a real lady’s man too … even dated a big star back then, Jane Powell. He’s sharp as a tack and tough as nails even today. He’s been in Boulder City, NV for over 40 years now, and everyone here knows him … he’s a real character and a great guy!
March 16th, 2013
Actually, his hat is NOT on backwards … I took it off him and checked it. It’s a real cowboy hat that he has painted orange so many times that it weighs about five pounds. And the red tape on it and his jacket is reflective for visibility in traffic when he rides his Yamaha scooter at night. He ain’t no dummy!
March 27th, 2013