10.15.

A Man & His Stuffed Animal

Police in Brooksville have arrested a man for allegedly masturbating using a stuffed animal inside Walmart.

Police say 19-year-old Sean Johnson of Lake Panasoffkee has been charged with indecent exposure in public and criminal mischief for the act.

Officers responded to the Walmart on Broad Street just before 3 p.m. Tuesday for the complaint. Employees say they saw Johnson using a stuffed horse toy and go to the bedding department where he masturbated into the animal. The incident was caught on camera.

He then put the toy, now covered in ejaculate, back on the shelf, police say. Other items were contaminated and could not be sold.

Related: Man accused of having sex with pool float, again

Johnson fled the store but was located by police nearby. He was arrested and taken to the Hernando County Jail on $1,500 bond.’

Wow! Just freaking wow! How is that even an thought that goes on in your head? This guy is a real….jerkoff? Huh? Didn’t see that coming did you? You liked it though.

Florida

28 Comments Featured Creature  //  Florida  //  Funny  //  Random 10.14.

Caution: Walcreature Approaching

I’m not quite sure what my man here is doing with a street sign in Walmart. Maybe he is trying to act like he bought it and wants to return it. Maybe he is one of the hundred of idiots we’ve seen park right over a sign and he is being a good person and bringing it back in. I don’t know, maybe you guys have some ideas. I’m lost, because clearly there is no sign to point me in the right direction now.

Arizona

11 Comments Arizona  //  Featured Creature  //  Funny  //  Random 10.13.

Monty & His Python

Overcompensating for something bro?

Ohio

12 Comments Animals  //  Featured Creature  //  Funny  //  Ohio  //  Random  //  Walmart Fashion 10.02.

KANGAROO SONG!

Just because you will always be your mother’s baby doesn’t give you a reason to still act like one when you’re 6’4″ and pushing a deuce and a quarter.

Nebraska

21 Comments Featured Creature  //  Funny  //  Nebraska  //  Random