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04.23.

Woodstock 2012

Woodstock – WOODSTOCK- The 20-year-old man arrested for exposing his genitals at two Woodstock locations pleaded guilty and was sentenced in Woodstock court Wednesday.

David Stevens was sentenced to serve 17 days in jail but will serve 15 of those days because of credit given for his pretrial custody. He was also ordered to submit a DNA sample for the national DNA databank and received two years of probation.

The Woodstock Police Service had been searching for Stevens after incidents at the Wal-Mart and the Woodstock Public Library. In both incidents, he exposed himself to women in the aisles of each location.

The Wal-Mart incident was reported on July 11 and the Woodstock Public Library incident took place on July 14. Police released surveillance footage from both events on July 20, asking for the public’s assistance in identifying the suspect.

The original two counts of mischief were dropped from Stevens’ list of charges. For each act of exposing himself, he received 17 days, minus time spent in custody and the same sentence for breaching a prior probation order to keep the peace and be on good behaviour. The sentences are to be served concurrently.

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10.19.

That’s My Tomato!

Idaho Falls Police arrested Keith William McQuilliams early Friday morning for aggravated assault after he threatened four men while shopping at Walmart.

McQuilliams, 32, of Idaho Falls was booked into the Bonneville County Jail.

According to reports, McQuilliams and four men, just around midnight, started verbally arguing in the produce section of the Idaho Falls Walmart. A store manager intervened and the men dispersed from the section.

Then later, McQuilliams confronted the men again in the sporting goods section. The men said McQuilliams pulled out a 4-inch blade pocket knife and displayed it towards them.

Officers responded and detained McQuilliams in the northside parking lot.

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03.15.

Thong Spotting

I stopped by my local Walmart to quickly use the bathroom. I went inside and noticed an elderly greeter at the doors. Wanting to be nice, I said hello as I approached. The guy said nothing. I did a bit of a double take (since when do Walmart greeters not say hello?!) and he turned back to me with a somewhat dazed look. “Oh, I’m sorry. I was checking out that lovely lady over there.” I was a little creeped out, but I nodded and said, “Yeah”. “It’s the perfect job for that kind of thing, you know” he said, giving me a bit of a wink. I looked back. The woman was morbidly obese. To give him credit, the woman’s thong was falling out. She wasn’t a creature, but she certainly wasn’t attractive.

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05.12.

The Parent Trap

I went to just go pick up a few miscellaneous items, hoping to finish up quickly before the rainstorm came in. I was browsing the makeup aisle when all of a sudden I heard a man yelling not far from me. I glanced over and saw a young boy sliding accross the floor. The man, I’m assuming to be his father, yells at him to “Get the fuck up!”

The poor kid was pushing away, with his arm up. “Get your fucking ass off the floor, you son of a bitch!” The man then grabs at the kid and throws him another two feet! I couldn’t believe what I saw! The mom just chimes in “Just get the fuck up.” And what does the kid say? “I’m sorry! When it went off it made me jump!” In the background was a stupid motion-detecting Easter bunny that sings when you pass it.

It didnt end there! I finally left the place and waited outside for the rabbit transit to get there, and your typical redneck family comes out of the store. Both parents were no older than 20 years old, and already had 3 little ones about 2-4 years old, two girls and one boy. The little boy started screaming (playfully) while covering his head, as if protecting himself from the rain. The dad then yelled at the top of his lungs, “SHUT THE FUCK UP! IT’S NOT EVEN RAINING!!” The kid, with a little smile, says “It’s not? Oh!” and started laughing. The dad then yelled at the mom saying “TAKE THIS LITTLE SHIT AWAY FROM ME!”

Mom’s response? “And do what with him?” Dad – “I DUNNO JUST TAKE HIM!”

Mom does exactly that, now trying to control 3 rowdy little ones, and what does daddy do? Hops into his car and takes off, leaving them behind…

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People of Walmart - Funny Photos Of Walmart Shoppers - Humor Blog

People of Walmart is a humor blog that depicts the many customers of Walmart stores across the United States and Canada. Through funny photos and videos, People of Walmart is an entertainment blog in the Three Ring Blogs network that features over 30 of the funniest humor blogs on the internet. Walmart is the largest retail store in the United States and has millions of people visit stores each day wearing anything but proper attire. Hello Flippa.

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