A few years ago I was doing a little shopping at the local Wal-Mart (which happens to be the busiest in our Metro area). I try to avoid Wal-Mart at all costs, but sometimes you have no choice but to stop in and fight the crowds. Now if there’s anything I try to avoid MORE than Wal-Mart, it’s the Wal-Mart ladies room but again…sometimes you just gotta go, and the Sonic Route 44 cherry limeade I’d been sipping all afternoon had to go. As luck would have it, I ended up following an employee in. Just as I get the stall door locked I hear “Hey, what’s up?” I’m thinking “uhhh, is she talking to me?” then heard her continue talking – she was on her cell phone! I kinda chuckle to myself, amused that she was on her phone. Then I hear what can only be described as her groaning with effort…while still on the phone. At this point, I’m trying to pee as fast as I possibly can all the while being treated to a play by play of what’s going on in the other stall. She’s telling the person on the other end of the phone about how she’s been constipated for days and is FINALLY going and how bad it hurts (I’ll spare you the graphic descriptions). I wanted to die laughing but was too busy holding my breath against the horrible smell she was producing. So after I finish my shopping, I go to checkout. Imagine my horror when I realize the cashier is the lady from the bathroom!
So I was at work tonight and I went into the mens restroom stall and I paused, something black with a cord attached to it was hanging on the seat. A co-worker was in there also and I asked him what the hell it was?. He fished it out of it with the side of his shoe. And out came a lovely Butt-Plug that was attached to some remote controlled device. Obviously the self flushing toilets there surprised him and when it popped out it was flushed down the hole. Was a truly disgusting thing to behold. It’s always nice when work takes a turn for perversion mixed with elements of scatological humor.
This was about 4 or 5 years ago in a Walmart near Orlando. It was quite late at night, so not very crowded, but there happened to be a couple with two young kids near the photo station in the center of the store. One parent was carrying one child and the other parent was pushing a kid sitting in the cart. They looked like a normal family…dressed just fine… not overweight…kids being quiet. I was busy trying to find camera batteries when I heard an unpleasant sound and looked up to see that the kid in the cart had lost his dinner all over the floor. After a considerable amount of vomiting, he looked pretty green yet, so I can understand the parents wanting to help him as quickly as possible, and maybe rushing off. Of course I thought one of them might take the kids and run to the rest room while the other tried to get help cleaning the floor. No. On both counts. While there was an employee working in the photo development area, the parents did not alert them, or anyone else…instead they casually pushed the cart away (the kid was still slightly wretching), as if nothing happened, and left a lovely mess on the concrete floor behind them (the wheels of the cart were also helping to drag the mess further along). I’m pretty sure the walmart employee looked up, but whether they heard or saw the mess (the photo counter may have blocked the view), they didn’t stop what they were doing. Finally, beyond disgusted, I alerted the employee to the “problem area”, and he/she said they’d take care of it. I think I left without buying anything….just hoping I wouldn’t run into the parents still shopping while their kid was continuing to be sick!
I was working at a Walmart outside of Baltimore. This very pale faced and shaking middle aged woman comes up to me. She doesn’t say a word, but in one hand she’s holding a pair of panties by the hanger. In the other was a glob of gooey stuff. I knew right away what it was, but I just gave her a rag, took the panties, and led her to the bathroom. I called the manager and explained the situation, he gave the customer a big discount. Only after she was gone did we go into the break room and laugh our asses off.