I feel like you are one of those card girls who walk around in between rounds during a fight. Probably not a real boxing match, but more like one of those Bum Fights.
Oh good God, where is PETA when you need them? Sure it’s not real Zebra skin but c’mon that offends the shit out of me!
Wowzer!!!! I think the vicious cycle of irony just hit me in the face like a ton of bricks! How do you not see this lady? You’ve got Budweiser yoga pants on yet it’s all that Budweiser that’s causing you not to do yoga so you don’t look good in your Budweiser yoga pants. My brain hurts now. Time for a beer.
He seems normal enough around St. Patty’s Day until he shows you his pot of “gold” in the men’s room.