The difference between me and you? When I get my trophy wife, I’m shooting for 1st place not the second to last one who drunkenly stumbled across the line.
I feel like I’m a kid again and my mom just told me I’m allowed to pick one thing…umm…ummm….okay. Okay. I’m gonna go withhhhhh…Oh! Oh! I’m gonna pick the gooshy back fat tat. It’s like a genuine tramp stamp because it stretches the entire back so you can’t miss it while trying to pick her up at a gas station at 3a.m. on a Tuesday.
I guess this little piggy literally went to the market. Now if you don’t mind, while you’re eating roast beef, I’m gonna go wee wee wee all the way home!
Did you know they say Twinkies would survive a nuclear apocalypse? Just an FYI. Now you have something to talk to that cute co-worker about…you’re welcome.