I was shopping in the frozen foods section of Walmart the other day looking for something to satisfy my sweet tooth. So while roaming the ice cream section I heard a noise above me, and I looked up in curiousity. There were a group of birds flying about, and not wanting to get pooped on, I moved away.
Later I still didn’t get the ice cream I wanted so I went back to get some. The birds were still there but I decided to brave them. Just then a mother in her twenties came around the corner with her little 5 year old. The mom got a bucket of rocky road and placed it in the cart. While she was looking at the frozen pizzas, one of the birds let off a little “load of relief”. The little boy wanted a taste of the “good white stuff” so the mother dipped her finger in the fresh pile not knowing what it was and let the boy lick it. The boy made a face, and started to cry. The mom then smelled her finger and yelled out “That is not fucking rocky road!!!!” then tossed the ice cream on the floor and left.
If the Irish have so much damn luck, how come I see WAY more Asian people than Irish people in Vegas? Riddle me that.
I haven’t the slightest idea of what’s going on out in Row 4 of the Walmart parking lot, but I suspect some of you might have some ideas. Let’s hear ’em and the best one gets to join this guy’s band.
Well after all this time I’m still not sold on the whole poppin’ your titty our to feed your child in public. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m completely ok with the first part of that sentence, but as soon as a kid gets involved I lose interest. Maybe someone can change my mind and convince me that it’s a completely natural and acceptable thing to do in public, but it would take some serious Johnny Cochran type of argument to get me on board.