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12.28.

Merry Christmas Eve, Eh?

BATAVIA, N.Y. — A woman is spending her Christmas in jail, accused of punching a Walmart greeter as she left the store here Christmas Eve.

Batavia resident Jacquetta Simmons, 26, was charged with two counts of second-degree assault, State Police Trooper Tracy Patterson said. She faces a second count because the victim, Grace Suozzi, 70, is older than 65.

Patterson said Simmons is accused of punching and knocking down Suozzi at 11:23 a.m. after the employee asked Simmons to see receipts for items the customer was carrying in store bags. After hitting Suozzi, Simmons ran out of the store, but employees and customers quickly surrounded her until police arrived.

Suozzi suffered fractures to the left side of her face and significant swelling, Patterson said.

Simmons on Sunday was being held in Genesee County Jail in lieu of $20,000 bail.

Patterson said Simmons had receipts for everything in her bags.

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03.31.

Walmart Bumper Cars

My son and I were walking back to our car which was parked way out near the street when we heard a squealing of tires and a crash. We looked over into the next row of parked cars to see a woman in a midsize green car pushing a parked car as she turned left. She pushed the parked car into the next 3 cars in that row crashing them all together like dominoes. Then she moved to the cars parked across the aisle and hit one of those pushing it into another 5 cars before she finally stopped. Making a total of 10 wrecked cars from one crazy WalMart driver (11 if you count hers). I grabbed my seven year old and ran away from the area. In case she started going again I didn’t want my son to be injured.

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03.11.

Happy Birthday Sprinkles!

On March 3, 2010, we were at Walmart ordering my daughter’s 18th birthday cake. The clerk took all the information. We decided that we wanted a gender neutral cake with no flowers or girly decorations, because my daughter wanted to share the cake with her friend since his birthday was 2 days after hers. While the clerk was verifying the details, the cake decorator came over and looked at the request. She said. ” Is this all you want on the cake?” I said, “Yes, just Happy 18th Birthday Taylor and Zach.” Then the decorator asked if we wanted sprinkles on the cake. My daughter said yes, because she didnt think that would be too girly. So the clerk wrote it on the order. On March 5th, I sent my husband to pick up the cake. He got it and was heading to the check out when he looked at the cake better and it read..”HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY TAYLOR, ZACH AND SPRINKLES” He wondered who sprinkles was and if we had gotten a cat!!!! He returned to the cake counter and told them that the cake was wrong and they the attempted to remove “Sprinkles”, it left a big place in the icing that was very noticeable. The decorator then asked my husband if we wanted sprinkles on the cake to cover the place that they tried to fix. He told her that was what we wanted in the first place.

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03.24.

Money In The Bank

As my husband, our good friends and I were leaving Walmart one night my husband spots what he thinks is a wad of dollar bills on the ground. He picks it up only to discover it is $1 wrapped around a piece of poo.

Freaked out he drops the money and we look around for the hidden cameras and hand sanitizer. That had to have been a prank. Who would wrap a piece of poo with money and leave it outside of a Walmart?

As we look around for the hidden camera we spot a typical Walmart customer bend over, pick up the poo encrusted dollar, shake off the bill, wipe it on her sweat pants and stick it in her pocket.

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People of Walmart - Funny Photos Of Walmart Shoppers - Humor Blog

People of Walmart is a humor blog that depicts the many customers of Walmart stores across the United States and Canada. Through funny photos and videos, People of Walmart is an entertainment blog in the Three Ring Blogs network that features over 30 of the funniest humor blogs on the internet. Walmart is the largest retail store in the United States and has millions of people visit stores each day wearing anything but proper attire.

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