Stories

03.10.

Bonding Time

I was shopping with my girlfriend and had to piss. I go into the bathroom and start pissing in one of the urinals. A dude was in the stall next to me. He was shitting. Very loudly. While he shat, he laughed hysterically and yelled:

Dude: “You like that, Garret? AHAHAHA!!! You like it?!!!”

Kids voice: “Yeah, daddy! More!”

Dude: “Here it comes…”

*FAAART*

Kid: “HAHAHA!!! MORE!”

*SHIT PLOPPING IN WATER*

After I finished peeing, I backed up to see under the stall and saw the legs of a man sitting on the toilet and the feet of a child standing, facing the man. I guess it’s a game they play?

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07.06.

Five Knuckle Shuffle

I have seen some pretty sick stuff since I started working for Walmart, but last night took the cake. I work at a Walmart in a college town and during the summer months we always have girls coming in to do late night shopping in their bikinis. Last night an older gentleman came into the story and was wandering around the men’s clothing. This guy was watching everyone in the area pretty closely, and when the coast was clear, he moved into the middle of one of the shirt racks. This guy wasnt very tall and was able to easily squat down under the rack. One of the ladies in the area called me over the walkie and asked that I come over to the area to see what was going on. As I walked over to the shirt rack I noticed 3 very cute girls in bikinis in the womens area looking at underwear, and I heard a moaning sound coming from the rack. I ran away from the shirt rack and had one of the associates call the police. The police arrived at the store pretty quickly and apprehended the guy as he was finishing his business.

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03.15.

Parking Lot Picnic

Let’s start by saying I loathe Wal-Mart. It takes an act of congress to get me near one…..or an act of my girlfriend. Anyhoo…..there are times that fate brings me our local store. Franticaly looking for a last minute gift late one evening, I find myself in a traffic jam in the store parking lot. Assuming someone had broke down in the middle of the lane, myself, as others started to drive around the obstacle that lay ahead. As I neared, slowly, the scenario started to attack my synapses.

There, in the middle of the lane, was a man passing out fried chicken to his extremley large family. They were all gathered around the shopping cart like flies to…..well, you know. They were having a friggin’ picnic in the parking lot at Wal-Mart…..at night.

Had this behavior been displayed in the parking lot of our local Target or Kohls, I would have been surprised. But sadly, I was not surprised to see it at our local Wal-Mart. These folks paid no more mind to the traffic avoiding them then they did to sound judgment. I must admit, instead of being angry and cussing the family as most did while driving by them, I found a great amount of jest in the situation.

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03.29.

Indecent Exposure

Belmont Police charged a Gastonia man with indecent exposure after a 39-year-old woman reported seeing his private parts as she drove past him in the Walmart parking lot Monday.

Jeffrey Michael Cowart, 23, of 4063 Mountainview St., was jailed under a $1,000 bond.

The woman told police she was a passenger in a car and as she was leaving the Walmart in Belmont she saw Cowart standing near a Jeep Cherokee exposed. She told police she couldn’t be sure what he was doing.

She told police she was concerned about other people coming out of Walmart with children, according to a warrant affidavit written by Belmont Police Officer R.A. Berry.

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7 Comments Stories
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People of Walmart - Funny Photos Of Walmart Shoppers - Humor Blog

People of Walmart is a humor blog that depicts the many customers of Walmart stores across the United States and Canada. Through funny photos and videos, People of Walmart is an entertainment blog in the Three Ring Blogs network that features over 30 of the funniest humor blogs on the internet. Walmart is the largest retail store in the United States and has millions of people visit stores each day wearing anything but proper attire.

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