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09.02.

Unedited For Your Enjoyment

I have worked in Cosmetics for most of my adult life. We’re talking in a department store like Neiman-Marcus, Nordstrom, etc. so when we moved to a little place in the Foothills above Sacramento, I was limited as to where to work. Wal-Mart was it – so I applied. At first, when I was in Cosmetics, it was actually not that bad– aside from hillbillies trying to steal Maybelline, it was a job. Soon, however- I became a department manager— and then it rolled right down hill. Being a gay guy working for Wal-Mart is already like being a traitor to one’s race, but for a bit I was the Department Mnager for Intimate Apparel/ Hosiery/ Handbags/ Bras and Panties…… I KNOW– if I were a cross-dresser–hot!– but I am not and even though I am gay–it’s a little unnerving to be doing price changes on bras while women are trying them on. At least I thought they would be……………
Day 1: A woman with tits down to her ankles, fully discards her top – titties to the ground…pulls them up and shoves them in my face and says
“Ya got anything for these babies/” -her smile and beguiling summer teeth ( summer gone, summer black, etc.) tauntig me. Swallowing the vomit in my mouth I pointed to the tube socks and said—- “those outta work”…… I was written up for it.

Day 3: I am handed a metal spatula — the kind you would do caulking with — on a lanyard. I was like ????????? WTF? I should have known. When I asked about it– my little dressing room associate said –it’s to scrape the pantyliners from the swimsuits off the dressing room walls.
YUP. Nasty. The fact that is was on a lanyard to wear around your neck –unbelieveable.

THE KICKER: Some senior citizens have SERIOUS incontinence issues. We get it. Wear your depends and live your life. People steal A LOT from Wal-Mart, so it comes as no surprise to find dirty jeans in a heap on the dressing room floor–switched out for new ones. Beware of inside-out ones tho— as a girl associate of mine found out — she put her hand down the pantleg to turn it out and came back with an armful of shit. I am talkin from shoulder to nail covered in human excrement. It’s no wonder good help is hard to find…….shitty customers make it so.

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People of Walmart is a humor blog that depicts the many customers of Walmart stores across the United States and Canada. Through funny photos and videos, People of Walmart is an entertainment blog in the Three Ring Blogs network that features over 30 of the funniest humor blogs on the internet. Walmart is the largest retail store in the United States and has millions of people visit stores each day wearing anything but proper attire.

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