Whenever the carnival is in town, it is set up directly across the street from our local Wal-Mart. One afternoon, an intoxicated carnival worker wandered into the store. He went to the meat department first and opened a package of sausages to eat. I guess he needed something to wash the sausages down with because he proceeded to the beer aisle, opened a box and cracked a beer. An employee had alerted a manager by this time and before long the police arrived. The carny took off running (still holding the open beer and sausages) as soon as he saw the police, screaming “I ain’t stealing, I got money!” Thankfully, they apprehended him right in front of my office and I got to see the whole thing. I don’t know which he had less of, teeth or sense.