Stories

03.28.

From Bob The Poet

I was sitting home alone one night
Feeling a little bored.
I stumbled upon a web site
With pictures from a store.
I wasted half the night away,
Clicking through the pics.
Some were laugh loud funny
And some were down right sick.

People of WalMart, all across the land.
People of WalMart, I’ve become a fan.
You never know who you’ll see
As you walk down that next aisle.
People of WalMart
Always make me smile.

There was that chubby lady
With her boobs tucked in her pants.
Could that have been the latest
Fashion trend from France?
That sexy little thing
Just looked a little weird.
I knew why on the next pic
When I saw the beard.

People of WalMart, all across the land.
People of WalMart, I’ve become a fan.
You never know who you’ll see
As you walk down that next aisle.
People of WalMart
Always make me smile.

Now I don’t put these people down
To each his or her own.
But I often wonder
If they have mirrors at home.
Are these individuals
Crazy, blind or brave.
I don’t know, but I will bet
Sam Walton’s spinning in his grave.

People of WalMart, all across the land.
People of WalMart, I’ve become a fan.
You never know who you’ll see
As you walk down that next aisle.
People of WalMart
Always make me smile.

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10 Comments Funny  //  Stories
12.13.

Lucky

My bf and I just got back from stopping by Walmart on the way home to pick up MILK and ONLY MILK. That’s always how it starts right? Some lady had three German shepherd mixes in a shopping cart outside, giving them away for free. I picked one up and (keep in mind, it was about 9 pm so it was dark) noticed a couple small ticks on the 2 month old pup. No biggie, we had shampoo and spray and tweezers at home. We finished our shopping and left and the woman was GONE. We got home to find out that this poor dog had nearly 200 ticks on it’s tiny body, even some as big as kidney beans stacked up under it’s arms 4 or 5 ticks deep. My great boyfriend sat there and bathed this poor dog and spent about two hours picking every last tick off. He’s still getting used to his new home but definitely has a fitting new name, Lucky. Partly because that woman better thank her lucky stars we don’t know where she lives!

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8 Comments Funny  //  Stories
02.24.

Watch Your Children

I was grocery shopping with my daughter & grandma at my local Walmart. My daughter was barely two at the time so she sat in the cart. I was going through the aisles when my grandma realized she forgot something so she left the aisle I was in. I went to grab something off the shelf (while taking my hands off the cart for a split second) when all of a sudden some guy grabbed my shoulder. In the creepiest voice imaginable he proceeded to tell me to keep close eye on my daughter because his was kidnapped that very same day. In complete shock all I could fathom was “I’m sorry” and tried to hurriedly get away from him. He then said he’d help “keep an eye out for me” and followed me the next two aisles. Once my grandma returned I whispered to her to get out of here, don’t ask any questions. I grabbed my daughter and left the cart full of stuff. I told my grandma the story in the car (she’s very naive) and she said “Maybe he was just warning you,” but I told her why would a guy who’s daughter was just kidnapped be trolling the aisles of Walmart?

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24 Comments Stories
01.30.

The Little Fire Hose

My cousin and I were standing next in line for checkout and were noticing the family checking out in front of us. There was an older woman, her teenage daughter and who I’m thinking was the baby’s daddy with their somewhat “bouncy” little boy sitting in the cart checking out. We weren’t paying them much attention until we just happened to notice the little boy suddenly sticks his legs straight out and liquid started shooting out towards us and hit the very end of our cart.

We backed the cart up quickly and watched in horror as a rather large puddle accumulated on the floor in front of us. As we tried to alert the people in front of us of the situation they proceeded to check out and when they finally understood that their son/grandson just urinated on the floor they looked at it and left.

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12 Comments Funny  //  Stories

People of Walmart - Funny Photos Of Walmart Shoppers - Humor Blog

People of Walmart is a humor blog that depicts the many customers of Walmart stores across the United States and Canada. Through funny photos and videos, People of Walmart is an entertainment blog in the Three Ring Blogs network that features over 30 of the funniest humor blogs on the internet. Walmart is the largest retail store in the United States and has millions of people visit stores each day wearing anything but proper attire. Hello Flippa.

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