A few years ago I was out at night with my parents and before heading home they decided that they needed to go get a few things at Wal-Mart. It was about 9:00 pm so the place was fairly crowded but we were lucky enough to find a parking spot pretty close to the front doors. Well I was tired and a bit lazy so I decided to stay in the car and listen to the radio while they went inside and shopped. Now I’m not going to say what happened next was funny or disgusting or worthy of being posted on PoWM but it was an unique experience and I feel kinda left out that nothing truly amazing has happened to me at Wal-Mart, so I’m going to try.
After a few minutes I noticed a couple girls walking out but didn’t pay them too much attention until they got to their car which was parked on the next aisle over from where I was. They just stood around outside their car and talked for a few minutes (big deal, right?) but then they started making out. (Yes, another making out at the wally world story) Now, I just think it is in bad taste for anyone to make out, regardless of sexual orientation, in a very public place.
But, I thought “Whatever floats their boat” and continued to jam out to some tunes. But, since they were pretty much right in front of me I couldn’t help but watch in fascination as they continued to make out oblivious to the world around them. Well after a few minutes of this I guess they decided that making out on the back of their car wasn’t enough. So they get in the front seats of their vehicle (which I thought was odd given what happened next) and I see their seat backs lower and soon disappear. Now (1) if you are going to be doing that get in the back seat, it’s a lot more comfortable and (2) don’t do it in such a public place where anyone can just walk up and see you…which is exactly what happened.
A few minutes later this guy comes out of Wal-Mart and apparantly notices the activity in the car. So he gets to within about 2 feet of the car and watches…he was still watching about 15 minutes later when my parents finally came out and we left. Subtle dude, real subtle.
One time I went to my neighborhood Walmart on a Saturday evening at about 6:00 pm. This Walmart was in a poor neighborhood in town. As I was going through the entrance, I noticed that the cart area was closed because a Walmart worker was mopping something up. I listened closer and heard the worker explain to the customer: “Oh, this area’s closed. Someone threw up here. I’m surprised because the homeless don’t usually throw up until later on Saturday nights after they’ve gotten drunk.” Mind you, she wasn’t phased that there was vomit on the floor, only that it was so early on a Saturday night. What mustn’t one get used to while working at Walmart?
I decided to go into my local Wal-Mart last night to grab a few items around 11:30. Surprisingly, I only saw one powermullet, and was quite sad that I didn’t catch any humorous displays as I usually do, until I got to the checkout line. Of course, only two lanes were open, but I got lucky and ended up behind two people. The first person had a buggy full, but the second guy had three 40 ounce beers. In my town, it is against the law to sell an alcoholic beverage after midnight, so when the guy finally got to the counter, he was quite dismayed to hear that he couldn’t purchase his beers because it was now 12:02.
“BUT I’VE BEEN WAITING IN LINE FOR 10 MINUTES!” he yelled at the obviously grumpy young “lady” at the register. Another customer piped in and told him just to drive over the bridge that separates our town from our “sister” city which does sell after midnight. This just made the hostile drunk even more hostile. “NO, I want my beer, NOW!” He finally accepted the fact that the register would not allow the girl to even ring the beer up and stumbled/stomped towards the doors.
I ended up, as unlucky and unbelievable as it sounds, being parked right next to this drunk. By the time I got to my car, a good 5 minutes after he walked out, he was trying frantically to unlock his car. He couldn’t get the key into the hole for the life of him. Finally, though, he succeded and almost belly flopped into the driver’s seat. I watched in horror (and slight amusement) as he, I assume, attempted to put his car in reverse, but instead put it in drive, and went through the bars of the shopping cart return and snowplowed about 20 carts. I’d never seen a shopping cart fly until last night.
I was standing behind two young girls at my local Walmart a couple of weeks go. One girl casually stated that she was going on a cocaine diet. The other girl said she found starving herself a much cheaper & effective way to lose weight because you don’t have to buy cocaine or food. I could not believe I was witnessing this conversation.