Belly Up

Three years ago I was heavily pregant with my first child. As the due date grew closer I decided to venture to the local Wal-Mart in Goose Creek, SC to purchase a few needed items. Naturally I went straight to the infant section, scanning through the bottles and bibs trying to decide what to purchase a group of women came near me. Normally I would not list ages, but I would guess these women were in their mid to late 20’s. Giggling like school girls who had their first crush they all paused to look at my rather large belly. I’m a short 5’4″ and looked as if I would topple over at any minute. Not trying to be rude I offered them a polite smile and continued my shopping, whistling to myself even. Nothing could prepare me for what happened next, and I do mean nothing. Suddenly two of the four women apporached me, offering their congratulations and asking the usual questions about due dates and boy or girl things. Again not wanting to be rude I answered them. At this moment the other two women appeared at their side with a measuring tape and a fit of giggles. I looked on in horror as they attempted to measure the size of my belly, and ‘ooh and ah’ while doing so. Next, one of them reached out to pat me, and even squeezed what they could of my stomach and asked once again when I was due. By this point I had reached my limit and replied by reaching out for her belly (I’ll add now that she was a rather thick woman) rubbing it back, asking “I’m more interested in your due date. Perhaps you’re having twins?” I smiled. She glared and stomped off but not before swearing at me, saying how rude it was to touch her and declared she wasnt pregnant. However, I did manage to respond and loud enough for several customers to hear “Oh, I’m sorry I was under the impression that pregnant women were free for all to touch their bellies” Proud of myself I turned back to my shopping, but not before I heard a few claps and “You go girls!”

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Belly Up, 9.0 out of 10 based on 30 ratings

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People of Walmart - Funny Photos Of Walmart Shoppers - Humor Blog

People of Walmart is a humor blog that depicts the many customers of Walmart stores across the United States and Canada. Through funny photos and videos, People of Walmart is an entertainment blog in the Three Ring Blogs network that features over 30 of the funniest humor blogs on the internet. Walmart is the largest retail store in the United States and has millions of people visit stores each day wearing anything but proper attire. Hello Flippa.

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